Joe Pilato

Joe Pilato

Joe Pilato works as an engineer and pub quiz host while developing his skills as a standup comic and storyteller. You may occasionally find him wandering the streets of NYC looking for adventure or possibly running into the woods to hide from civilization for days at a time.

Sunday, 20 November 2016 00:00

Party Hard Review

Make your way through large parties killing everybody without getting caught, all so you can get some sleep. Fun concept but it becomes repetitive and chore-like. Still, if you're missing out on Dishonored 2 and want to sneak around killing folk on a bargain, maybe pick this up and see how it does ya.

Thursday, 27 October 2016 00:00

Chalo Chalo Early Access Review

Chalo Chalo does one thing and it does it extremely well. If you have friends, buy this game now and invite them over immediately. You'll be threatening their lives in no time!

Thursday, 27 October 2016 00:00

AIRHEART - Tales of Broken Wings Early Access

As a Twin-Stick Shooter with crafting features, AIRHEART - The Tales of Broken Wings is a beautiful game with much potential. In its current state of Early Access, there are balancing issues between loadouts, too little focus on the advertised objective that is the act of fishing, and too short of a leveling curve regarding upgrades and crafting. If Blindflug Studios addresses these shortcomings, then the full release could be a hit. I'm hopeful: they clearly have the talent and the skills.

Tuesday, 27 September 2016 00:00

hackmud review

If you want a pure hacking game, one without the nonsense GUIs and 3D landscape battles of prime time television hacking, this is your jam. It might be a little too dense to fully enjoy for most, but I loved the concept and execution.

Monday, 19 September 2016 00:00

RIVE Review

RIVE is nothing new but tons of fun. It reads like a love letter to retro lovers of the twin-stick shooter, and I would gladly sign at the bottom. If you're feeling nostalgic for old space shooters, check this one out.

Wednesday, 14 September 2016 00:00

Divided We Fall Early Access Review

Rough around the edges but a satisfying game if you're into real-time strategy. Get in on the ground floor and watch this become an understated classic. If nothing else, you'll need the time to practice.

Friday, 02 September 2016 00:00

Pulse Shift Review

If you want a new concept in a taxing puzzle platformer, check Pulse Shift out. Otherwise, wait for the developers to perfect the recipe. Hopefully, they will.

Monday, 22 August 2016 00:00

Hero Generations: ReGen Review

Pretty handily the best game I've reviewed for OpNoobs. It's addicting, well thought out and made, and fun. Not mind-blowing, not something..

Almost guaranteed to be ugly. 

Thursday, 11 August 2016 00:00

Copy Kitty Early Access Review

Copy Kitty is a great blend of the 2D action platformers we love, but at its current stage of Early Access, is a slugfest that doesn't take full advantage of its main mechanic. If you miss old Mega Man, definitely pick this up now. Otherwise, give it the time for a full release.

Wednesday, 27 July 2016 00:00

Frozen State Early Access Review

Frozen State is well-made but has a steep learning curve, and you will probably keep dying while learning. Maybe as the game picks up speed, you get better at surviving, but the start game certainly feels like a chore. If you like challenging survival games that treat your successes with an air of "yeah you were supposed to do that now get moving before I kill you," check it out.

Wednesday, 27 July 2016 00:00

This is The Police Review

If you like dialogue-heavy games that sort truth from fiction from what-does-it-matter-so-long-as-the-job-gets-done, then you are going to want This Is The Police, for sure. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a city to keep safe.

Tuesday, 19 July 2016 00:00

10 Second Ninja X Review

If you like scrolly action games with heart, you will need this. Buy two copies, give one to a friend, become viciously competitive. The game lacks new mechanics and a good boss but other than that, it's fantastic. I may or may not have stopped writing this review to play for a bit more. I'd like to call dibs on reviewing everything Dan Pearce touches.

Sunday, 10 July 2016 00:00

Tormented 12 Review

As I started, I saw that the graphics were very simple--good, the developers must have focused on programming and story instead. In the tutorial, I was very nearly killed in the first example battle--great! This game is not going to be forgiving! But once I started the game proper, it all kind of fell apart. Poor programming, awkward jokes, and typos. I would not recommend Tormented 12 to anybody.

Sunday, 26 June 2016 00:00

Buy Casually

Hang back, play the games you have, wait for people to push a new game to its limits and the publisher to issue patches. Wait until a few trusted friends are insisting that you personally need this game. Put it on your Wishlist, wait for Steam to have a sale, then buy it. There's nothing like making a purchase that you know will be good--it's like having a seat all warmed up for you. Comfy.